REASONS WHY RELATIONSHIPS FAIL
The truth is that relationships do not just take care of themselves–they require commitment, self-awareness, unselfishness, and willingness to change and grow. We must learn to shift from “me” into “we” because the central focus of our lives. Committed relationships may survive ups and downs, but some patterns and behaviors may produce permanent damage. From my years as a therapist and understanding of the research, I would identify four damaging patterns that raise red flags about the condition of any relationship or marriage. If you recognize your relationship here, think of how to change course. Lets have a look on some reasons why relationships fail.
The role of communication in any relationship can’t be overemphasized. No relationship survives for long without the right amount of healthy communication between the two individuals involved. For the relationship to maintain its stability for a very long time, you have to hone your communication skills if you are not good at it. The ideal approach to address any issue in your relationship is to come out open on any issue and talk it over with your partner. There are no specific legislation for men or women to stick to when it comes to decent communication. The right strategy is to find time and discuss things over with your spouse before it develops into an irreconcilable difference.
DISTANCE AND SPACE
Everyone needs his or her own space, even when in a serious relationship. It takes two people to make a relationship work. It is important you know when your partner would like to be alone and admire his or her wishes. Give your partner some distance and distance he or she indicates a need to be alone. Trying to dominate all aspects of your partner’s life is not going to make your relationship work. If it does anything, stalking your partners each move will make him or her feel caged and uncomfortable in.
Do not try to conduct your partner’s life for him or her. Leave space for the evolution of self-confidence and independence. Giving your spouse distance and distance is something that you need to watch to be certain you don’t overdo it. Don’t be close all of the time and don’t be too far either. Pay attention to details to understand when the distance is getting wider so that you can discuss things over and close to the gap.
NOT MAKING THE RELATIONSHIP A PRIORITY
Our education system doesn’t teach us that loving relationships take work and daily commitment. It’s easy for the relationship to take a back seat when kids come together. If you don’t make time for intimacy, desire goes down. you stop talking to your partner about your fantasies, you start becoming more distant. And if you do not make time to do fun activities together and with all the family, you can begin to lead separate lives. If one partner spends all day in the world of work and the other in the world of kids and chores, then it can be a struggle to find common ground. With multiple kids, you may have to “divide and conquer,” with one spouse heading to the football field and another to dance practice. (reasons why relationships fail)
Arguments that get resolved, and expressions of anger, are parts of a healthy relationship. But enraged screaming at a partner can do damage both to them and the relationship. Couples in unhappy relationships can get into negative cycles, even where any fight rapidly escalates into accusations and negative remarks. There is truth in the saying that it’s easiest to hurt the people we care about. We understand how to go for their jugular–to hit them where they are vulnerable. And chronic stress makes it increasingly difficult to maintain emotional control.
To avoid damaging your relationship, it’s important not to talk about important issues when you have been drinking . If you or your spouse are emotionally bombarded, and to stick to this specific issue at hand, without throwing in the kitchen sink of past gripes. You need to communicate that a behavior is upsetting, but still communicate that your spouse is a beautiful person in your eyes. (reasons why relationships fail)
Friends and family could be more influential in your relationship than you are ready to admit. Most times, these loved ones can be quite supportive, but in times, they can give their friends or family members the kind of advice that might further aggravate the already tensed situation in your relationship. Know the kind of friends your partner keeps and also the kind of advice she/he receives out of them concerning. (reasons why relationships fail)
According to research, differences over money is one of the best reasons for marital dissolution. A few also does not have to be married to have money challenges.
Money issues and disputes tap into some of their deepest psychological needs and fears, including and not limited to trust, safety, security, power, control, and survival. (reasons why relationships fail)
GROWN APART, BOREDOM, STALENESS, RUT
If any of those four phrases written above resonates with your relationship experience, there are couple of elements to consider.
And if you are in a relationship for two decades or less, and you and your partner have “grown apart”, then it may be due to a lack of commitment. Different expectations, lack of compatibility, or the pure process of trial and error in mate-finding.
So, if you’re in a long-term relationship, its possible that life obligations got in the way of few connectedness and evolvement.
Loss or lack of confidence is one of the contagions to the long-term success of some couple. Without a doubt, a relationship misses two of the main anchors to a bond: safety and security. (reasons why relationships fail)
Trust issues may include factors such as jealousy possessiveness, unreasonable rigidity, Physical/sexual infidelity, relational game playing, lack of reliability and dependability, lack of emotional support, lack of financial compatibility, and lack of mutually-supportive targets.
If you believe hope is a major issue in your relationship , examine whether the absence of hope is based on a pattern of evidence (for instance, significant broken promises), or largely subjective emotions (such as jealousy without proof). Consider honestly whether the lack of hope is based on tangible material or unjustified fears. (reasons why relationships fail)
MOVING THROUGH LIFE WITH DIFFERENT SPEEDS
When one partner is learning and growing at a rapid speed, while another is stagnating. This might be a supply of relational divergence. One example of this would be a partner advancing quickly in her career. The professional and social circles of the bunch begin to diverge, and soon the couple themselves differentiate. They’ve physically, intellectually, and socially improved apart. (reasons why relationships fail)